I Want My Mum - Forums _ Breastfeeding 1 _ Help for a first-time breastfeeder - what’s useful?

This thread from our forums discusses what new mums might find helpful.

Posted by: Foffer74 Jun 6 2007, 11:59 AM
I have a friend who is due her second child next week. She didn’t breastfeed her first, or rather she started to but 10 years ago no-one was particularly supportive and she felt she was too young to be confident enough in seeking that support. She is going to give breastfeeding a go this time round and I would like to give her the best help possible as I know how valuable support is. Fortunately she has another friend who breastfed too and her own mother, so she has a few people to talk to.

Anyway, I am actually going to be on holiday while she is in those hard early weeks, and although I’ve told her she can phone me anytime, I’d like to do something practical to help her out. Yesterday I was saying to how good a ‘babymoon’ is and hoped she could do this as her other LO will still be in school until the end of the month. I also said that it’s a good idea to get a basket together with everything you need so that you can spend the time strapped to the sofa when you need to. So I was thinking about putting something together for her. What should I put in it?

I thought:

A big bottle of water.
A book.
BFC phone numbers.
Chocolate (naturally!!)
Maybe some vitamins?
What else?

I’d also like to print off some info for her about breastfeeding, basically the most likely things she will be wondering about - how much a newborn feeds, cluster feeding etc but I’ve forgotten the sort of things you ask yourself!! What do you think would be useful to a first time breastfeeder? Obviously I don’t want to overdo it either, so key things really.

Thank you!!

Posted by: Diana Jun 6 2007, 12:05 PM
lansinoh?
I Want My Mum gift subscription?
nursing necklace?
reminder bracelet?

Posted by: inga3tots Jun 6 2007, 12:13 PM
QUOTE(Diana @ Jun 6 2007, 01:05 PM) [snapback]168804[/snapback]
lansinoh?
I Want My Mum gift subscription?
nursing necklace?
reminder bracelet?
[/QUOTE]

Lol Diana, I was going to suggest Lansinoh and I Want My Mum subscription.

not something to give her, but maybe talk to her about skin to skin and how lovely it is. Maybe you could look into support in her area, pehaps a breastfeeding group, or a contact number for a local breast feeding councellor incase she needs a bit of extra support.

Inga

Posted by: Claire Jun 6 2007, 12:17 PM
I am watching this with interest. Things didn’t go according to plan for us first time round and I am determined that this time will be different. I’m sure your support will really help.

Posted by: Foffer74 Jun 6 2007, 12:24 PM
Lansinoh - doh! How could I forget? I’ve got a tube at home.

I had a big long chat with her yesterday where she asked lots of questions - everything from skin to skin to expressing and storing, so she seems really keen. She had been at a ‘workshop’ at the local health centre and she knows about the support groups. I’ve also emphasised the value of getting along to these and said I’ve made some of my closest mummy friends from going to the group, which gave her a boost cos I think she worries about being isolated.

Posted by: Diana Jun 6 2007, 12:39 PM
Don’t know how practical this is, but one thing that really helped me was to know about all the breastfeeding friendly cafes in town. If you knew the info and could compile a list for her it might be helpful. I know I ended up feeding wherever/whenever, but in the early days it was great to know where you could go and just not worry about it, iyswim!

Posted by: GingerKatieSparkles Jun 6 2007, 12:50 PM
There are a couple of good NHS booklets that she should be able to get from her midwife - good pictures of latching on etc and lots of (sensible and useful) information.

Possibly a DVD is better than a book at first - I can just about read (and post :-) while feeding now but at first I definitely needed both hands for baby. I’ve found the BrestFriend feeding pillow to be great (though not cheap), although only really for feeding in cradle position - for the first 10 days or so I was trying to use as many different positions as possible so didn’t use it that much. Also it can create a bit of a physical barrier to the older child which I think agravates jealousy sometimes.

Breast pads? Nursing T-shirt (I’ve just stocked up at H&M)? Muslins?

Claire - I also had a really rotten time with Maia, ended up in hospital at 5 weeks and stopped feeding her then. So far though, things are going well with Rosie - I still had a couple of blisters and soreness and blocked ducts for the first week, but I knew just how important it was to jump on that stuff straightaway. I still don’t want to tempt fate too much, but Rosie is 16 days old now, and my boobs and nipples looks normal, feeds don’t hurt apart from the first latchon, I haven’t had a blocked duct for 10 days and I’m pretty much happy to feed anywhere, anytime, which is oh so different to last time. You CAN do it

Posted by: laury Jun 6 2007, 01:52 PM
For the nursing basket, nuts and berries? Flapjacks? Good source of carbs & protein! 1000 muslins and bibs for super-spitters? Breast pads -no-one ever anticipates how many they will need.

Posted by: Foffer74 Jun 6 2007, 01:59 PM
All great ideas - thank you so much.

Posted by: Katie Jun 6 2007, 04:14 PM
I did a basket for my sister - I bought her a basket with handles (beach type thing) that stood up by itself and put a few bits in. Another time I’d also include a file with some printouts in clear plastic sleeves (so they can be sicked on and wiped clean!) and make sure it’s the kind of file - a ring binder perhaps - that will sit open by itself flat on a bed or next to her on the sofa for really easy reference. I basically did that for myself this time, with a few selected pages about getting the latch right - that takes away the effort of going to the PC and really means the information is right there where you need it and easy to flick through.

If I was doing it for someone else I would also include the four main helpline phone nos. in big letters on the first page and also details of local clinics/groups plus opening times and phone numbers. One of the big things that’s hard initially is finding time to do even the research that gets you a phone number, iykwim. And I’d also include a list of web addresses at the back - I’d put them in an email too and suggest she saves them but I’d also print them out in case it was e.g. a husband or mum going away to look something up.

I would keep the information 100% focused on practical stuff - how to breastfeed, not why to breastfeed.

Next time I might also put appropriately shaped pieces of cardboard marked ‘TV remote control’, ‘telephone’ etc.! I’m not sure if I’d put in a book but rather maybe just two or three really easy to read magazines.

I also had in mine Lansinoh, tissues, muslin, breast pads etc., as well as the snacks and the printouts. I took the file of latch printouts (and that good NHS leaflet with the pics) to hospital with me as well. I wouldn’t put nuts in personally as of all foods they’re probably one you might least want to eat round a newborn and get on their skin - OK I know a lot of people will anyway but that’s their choice; I just wouldn’t want to make that choice for them by putting them in the bag iyswim.

Have fun putting it all together - I enjoyed doing it for my sister, almost felt like getting ready for a new baby myself .

Posted by: seawood Jun 6 2007, 07:13 PM
Some fabby ideas here, I wish I’d had them all! Some other things I’d add would be a nice lip balm and hand cream - I found my skin was terribly dry after being in hospital and would always sit down to feed and spot my lip balm on the other side of the room, which would drive me mental. I have some *fabulous* Burts Bees stuff in atm, can highly recommend it.

What else…some nice teas if she’s into those or perhaps a cordial now it’s summer - I found hot chocolate very comforting but I did have a winter baby.

Oh, paracetamol. There’s nothing worse than accidentally starting out with a crummy latch (I really hope not but you never know) and finding you’ve no painkillers in the house.

Does she like to sew or anything like that? When K was tiny and wouldn’t sleep anywhere but on my lap, I used to stitch little cross-stitch patches for her t-shirts, you can get great little kits which are dead handy for times like. Stopped me dozing off in the chair, anyway.

Posted by: Emma Jun 6 2007, 07:22 PM
I put together a nursing bag for my friend, and one of the things I put inside was an insulating mug (you can buy them from places like Costa) to keep her cup of tea warm.

All the other things I put in have already been mentioned

Posted by: bluebell22 Jun 7 2007, 06:52 AMFirst time round I didn’t make great progress with books but found story tapes fantastic to sit and chill out and breastfeeding to.

Have to say my best breastfeeding accessory when he’s around is a totally supportive DH who fetches and carries and never complains. If there’s anyway you can help get DH on side I reckon that would be well worth the effort.

Posted by: RoseRed Jun 7 2007, 08:24 AM
Some fantastic suggestions here. The other thing that I would suggest is a pretty shawl so that she can snuggle up skin to skin with the baby while staying warm and covered up.

Posted by: Foffer74 Jun 14 2007, 10:36 AM
Thanks everyone.

I’m delighted to say that my friend had a baby girl (Hannah) on Monday morning (3 days early), so I had to quickly get a few things together for her, so didn’t have a chance to incorporate all your lovely ideas (Think I will for myself if there’s a next time though!). I erred on the side of practical rather than luxurious, so pads, lansinoh, tissues, muslin, water, chocolate and some info on latch, positioning, hunger cues, how breastfeeding works etc. I am also delighted to say that she is now home from hospital and so far doing really well, she seems quite determined to give it her best shot.

Posted by: Diana Jun 14 2007, 11:39 AM
Congratulations to your friend! Glad she’s doing so well.

Posted by: Foffer74 Jun 22 2007, 09:40 AM
Just to update, my friend is doing great - seems to be a natural. I’m so pleased for her. Her baby lost a little bit of weight as they do, but has now put it all back on and more, gaining a whopping 11oz in the first 10 days!!

She has found all the info really useful as she started to wonder why she was up every 1/2 hr at day 9/10, but the answer was right there for her on the stuff I printed and she was reassured, so having this info to hand has really helped her feel right about it.

Posted by: brupe Jun 22 2007, 11:55 AM
Yay! Really pleased all is going well and well done you for giving her the info to make it as easy as possible