The cause of a nursing strike can be sometimes difficult to identify, at least initially. Perhaps baby has had to wait too long for breastfeeds or been left to cry - something got in the way of his close relationship with his mother. Anything can cause this and sometimes the mother doesn’t find out what it was until much later. I’ve known this happen from 3 months.
How to deal with it:
1. Don’t force breastfeeds, keep baby happy and calm.
2. Pump/feed expressed breastmilk by easiest possible way to keep the breasts thoroughly and regularly drained. Rule No. 1 keep the baby well fed, and sufficiently fed.
3. Abandon all other responsibilities for several days and devote 24 hours/day to the baby. Hold him all the time, wear him all day, play with him a lot, bath with him, sleep with him, lots of skin to skin - attempt to get back “in touch” with the baby and regain his trust. If mother needs to draw the curtains and go around half-naked for most of the time, then that’s what it takes.
4. Offer the breast a lot, but don’t force it. If baby starts to struggle/arch/cry; stop offering and smile, laugh, pretend you didn’t mean it - but when baby is happy and relaxed (in an hour or so), offer again. When offering breast, make sure there are no clothes in the way, mother and baby are alone (no distractions, TV, other children, etc) in a quiet darkened room (or in the bath), offer “favourite” breast first, in “favourite” position, in “favourite” place etc. Often offering the breast while standing and/or rocking the baby can help. Some babies become enraged if placed horizontal, so the mother needs to slide the baby down from her shoulder and offer the breast with the baby upright. Sometimes having the baby upright straddling her leg can also work. She can “play” at dabbing the baby’s lips with the nipple, taking it away, dabbing again, laughing, keeping everything light and happy, as if this is a big game ..
5. Other helpful measures include always sleeping with the baby. And offering the breast once he is already asleep (sometimes the baby will take it and then wake up, realize what he is doing and reject it again), and eliminating all perfumes, deodorants and possible food sensitive.
6. Mother to pretend she is “seducing” this baby - be charming, do all the things that he likes, keep him very happy, treat him like Dresden china, keep offering the breast.
7. If the mother becomes distressed by baby’s refusal, she must try not to show it - put baby down somewhere safe, go outside and scream or kick something, but hide frustration from the baby (easier said that done, but she is bigger, cleverer, smarter than he is).
8. Keep offering breast. Eventually baby will try it out. May take one or two swigs and then come off. Mother is to “reward” baby with biiiig smiles and congratulations for even the smallest attempt, and let him call the shots, i.e. let him stop when he wants to, and offer again later. Tiny swigs may start to become longer. Eventually the baby is willing to breastfeed. When this happens the mother should offer the breast a lot, at every excuse, before she can start to relax and realize that the strike is over.
9. At this point, mothers often realize what went wrong in the first place, and become determined not to let it happen again - i.e. they become much more “careful” mothers of this quite sensitive baby.
I’ve never known these measures to fail if the mother is willing to embrace them. Often the strike is over within hours, not days. But the longer it took to happen, the longer it is likely to take to resolve.
Hope this helps.
Pamela Morrison IBCLC, Rustington, West Sussex
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December 1st, 2007